Hellsing: Ultimate

This’ll be the first time I re-watch Hellsing: Ultimate and boy am I excited. After having watched the first episode, I’m appreciating the ludicrousness of Hellsing in a way I hadn’t before, but if anything it makes me enjoy it more. 


  • It’s funny, and thought provoking, watching Hellsing as a British person, and a Londoner at that. Most British people are very secular, less than 10% go to Church on Sundays and most of those are elderly people. So the idea of state-sponsored vampire hunters running killing stuff in the name of ‘Protestantism’ is laughable. Besides, half of Northern Europe is historically Protestant…singling out the UK seems unjustified. 
  • It’s also funny to see how the Queen is portrayed. Contrary to popular belief, very few people that I’ve met think of the Queen as a figure deserving of awed respect. That’s not to say no one likes the Monarchy, I find the Queen adorable in a granny-kind-of-way, it’s simply that most people accept the Royal Family are all individuals that have their flaws and make gaffs sometimes (*cough* naked Harry *cough*). I’m a bit weird with the Monarchy though, while I view them as a quirky tradition that draws in tourism money, most people my age are more Republican. 
  • The Gratuitous English is hilarious especially when Father Anderson mangles bible verses. 
  • The destruction of London does make me a bit sad though. Oddly enough, I found the destruction of historical landmarks more distressing than all the dead people. One of the things I love about London is the way the past and present can both be seen in the around you. It’s not about Nationalism, most of British history is bloodstained and reprehensible from Colonialism to the Civil War to the Reformation, but i just like the continuity of it all. That being destroyed, even in fiction, gets to me. 
  • Can Alicard do anything without smirking?

Episode 1

  • Hellsing Manor is laughably inconspicuous. A stately home that size in London would be very well known and almost certainly owned by the National Trust. 
  • I must admit, I’ve never thought of the implications of the Northern Ireland conflict on religious vampire hunters

Episode 2

  • Alucard throughly destroying Luke Valentine is oh so satisfying.

Episode 3

  • Someone in the National Portrait Gallery (Or possibly the Tate Britain) is probably very confused about the sword-hole Father Anderson left in the floor.
  • Poor Swat team…they never saw it coming
  • Merrily fighting in the middle of Rio surrounded by press…’cose y’know fuck secrecy…

Episode 4

  • Integra has the same reaction to Alucard asking if war makes her aroused that a tsundere in any other anime might have to a man seeing up her skirt
  • It’s aesthetically convenient that Alucard and Anderson are the same height
  • Is it odd that I can totally see Anderson/Seras as a shipping? I suppose so, considering he’s both a priest, a vampire hater and staunchly anti-heathen. 
  • I love how Alucard is really nice to the Queen
  • Schrodinger is my favourite Millennium person
  • For once, the Major is right, shooting Schrodinger really was unnecessary, sure, he was unharmed but they didn’t know that!
  • Scenes like where Integra feeds Seras really remind you that Hirano also did hentai.
  • Rip van Winkle blushes while Alucard impales her slowly with her rifle…Most. Hardcore. Masochist. Ever. 
  • Alucard has to win the award for ‘Sexist character I would never, ever, want to have sex with”

Episode 5

  • The beginning of episode 5 has to be the most WTF intro of any anime episode ever…what makes it all the better is how Alucard is relatively unfased
  • It’s soooo bizarre seeing an anime version of London…the only other one I’ve seen is in Special S
  • I want a pet Schrodinger…now. 
  • Watching London get destroyed makes me really uncomfortable.
  • Integra is the textbook definition of Badass Normal
  • I’m a bit confused…why are the Catholics trying to destroy London? Surely it’s already pretty damn decimated by now
  • Integra can talk anyone into anything through sheer balls alone

Episode 8

  • Alucard really really should be the bad guy…

Episode 10

  • Hellsing has an incredibly satisfying ending. 

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